Bren Hoadley had waited long enough to become a mother. Childless in her late 40s, with a career as a public-school teacher surrounded by other people's children, she had a 13-year-old failed marriage and three years of gut-wrenching infertility treatments behind her. Neither produced the child she craved. So she had turned to an adoption agency that matches childless prospective parents with abandoned infants and toddlers in Russia and Ukraine, her heart set on adopting a baby girl stranded in an orphanage.

At one point in the unwinding-evening conversation, thoughts turn to marriage. Roberts says her parents were married for 62 years. "A happy marriage," she says. She, too, is in a good marriage, she says. They've been together almost 18 years. One by one, the women go around the room and tell how long their parents have been or were married. Blayney's parents were married for nearly 30 years. McComas's for 32 and the parents of Harbison and McShulskis were married 26 years. Everybody springs from happy marriages. There is a pause in the conversation as the women think about it. They look at each other and they begin to think of other romance writers they know. Perhaps there is more to writing popular romances than dashing characters, heaving bosoms, flirtatious scenes and teasing ellipses that lead like moist footprints to the unmade bed . . . Just about every successful romance writer they can name is the product of a long, happy marriage. Why? Making domestic noises, Wilder rummages around in another part of the house. There is a contemplative mood in the kitchen and yellow-orange light and perfumic fragrances. "Because," one of the women says, "you've seen the happily-ever-after."

The issue clearly is much larger than law enforcement. The education community must develop creative strategies that identify at-risk students and motivate them to remain in school. Some of that is already happening. Jackson has started Morrison Academic Advancement Center for struggling middle school students who are at risk of dropping out. The state Department of Education has a new computerized system of tracking student attendance, just one element of its dropout reduction strategy. Several GED programs, including one at Jackson State University, are available. The faith-based community, in the businesses of changing lives, must also become more intimately involved. Other service organizations must also be committed to becoming change agents. Now is not the time to stand on the sidelines. Still, the primary responsibility lies with parents. Parenting is serious business, an awesome responsibility. Parents must know how their children are doing in class and what they are doing at the mall.

Helping people interested in marrying to form successful marriages sounds fairly reasonable until we realize that Horn dismisses equal sharing of parenting roles inside a marriage as a misguided quest for ``androgyny.'' He and his allies claim not to want ``to turn back the clock'' to marriage based on male dominance and female subordination and economic vulnerability. They even assert that healthy marriage must be premised on ``equal regard.'' But few in the marriage movement understand this to mean that mothers and fathers have equal privileges and responsibilities in the worlds of politics, work and the home.

Attorney General Bill Lockyer was set to marry an Orange County civil rights attorney today in a private ceremony in Northern California, his spokesman said. Lockyer, 61, and Nadia Maria Davis, 31, met during Democratic Party activities and are expecting a baby late this summer ... Lockyer has been married twice before ... Lockyer formed a committee in January to raise money to run for governor in 2006 ... Barankin said he planned to be the ``best attorney general he can be, and he's also committed to being the best husband and father he can be.''

He knows the two women who tuck him into bed at night as Momma and is thrilled by visits twice a week from his biological father. But the carefree two-year-old boy being raised by three doting adults is forbidden to have more than two parents. The child's trio of would-be parents are "heartbroken" after a family-court judge from the Superior Court of Justice in London, Ont., turned down a request from the woman who is not biologically related to be declared the boy's parent on the same legal footing as his birth mother and father.

A growing number of people are leaving well-paid jobs and moving home to relieve stress, according to research published on Wednesday. Twelve million Europeans, mostly in well-paid, high-stress jobs and with young children, are downshifting -- taking a cut in salary or working fewer hours ... Every day 1,600 advertisements bombard Britons, the study says. This, combined with exposure to the internet, e-mails and mobile telephones and the "fragmentation" of the extended family, has pushed stress levels to breaking point ... "This is leading some to reassess what really matters to them -- is it to earn more and spend more or focus on family, relationships and other human and family values?"

The number of people being diagnosed with sexually transmitted infections (STIs) is now at record levels ... "Our research shows young and older people are finding it difficult to maintain condom use once they are in a trusting relationship," says Dr Ingham. "Obviously, if there is a STI it can then be transmitted."

Add �daddy� to the ever-expanding list of stuff available online. Thanks to the Web, what were once intensely private transactions are now routine retail exchanges in an open marketplace where consumers shop for sperm much the way they shop for cars. And business is booming. Cappy Rothman, medical director of California Cryobank, the world�s largest sperm bank, estimates that Americans bought about $45 million worth of frozen sperm (and related services) on the Internet last year.

Any mention of fathers is conspicuously absent. Indeed, the words "fathers," "fatherhood," or "dad" do not even appear on the sperm bank websites I visited. From their perspective, it is a benign neglect that makes business sense. Though they essentially market and sell "fathering" without the father, it still seems vulgar to be upfront about it. "Father-free babies!" is not nearly as appealing a concept as "Fat-free frozen yogurt!"
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And even the mothers want something more than sperm in a cup. The "Donor" sections of sperm bank websites are a bizarre mix of the anonymous and the personal. In addition to a laundry list of physical attributes (height, weight, eye color, blood type, etc.) and other vital stats (GPA and SAT scores), the donors answer essay questions about themselves, offering all of the insights of a personal ad ("I am easy-going, very likable, people do things for me, and I love the outdoors"). On Xytex's site, they even include baby pictures of the donors. And don't miss the "donor of the month," currently a 6'0" brown-haired (and balding) caucasian Christian who describes himself as "out-going, active, laid-back, stubborn" and says the he donated his sperm for "money" (which is by far the most common motive). Oh, and his favorite color is green and the celebrity he most resembles is Tom Cruise. As I looked through this catalog of "donor-dads," more and more I thought to myself, "This is not how it's supposed to happen."
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[S]omething seems amiss in our society when sperm banks are more likely to come up as the backdrop to a bad joke than as a subject of serious moral discussion.

Many of the poor single moms live with the fathers of their children, economist [Robert] Lerman said. But without marriage, the relationship usually doesn't promise them much in the way of long-term economic security.

"Cohabitation tends to involve a limited commitment," Lerman said. "It is not as clear as a forward-looking, investment-oriented approach" more common in married couples.

The researchers at Rutgers University in New Jersey believe the trend of living together is the main reason for the delay of marriage. Rutgers researchers are in the midst of a series of studies called "The State of Our Unions," about marriage in America. Their most recent survey, done by David Popenoe and Barbara Dafoe Whitehead, focuses on 25 to 33-year-old men. Popenoe and Whitehead discovered that "men can get many of the benefits of marriage without the commitment to marriage, or as they often point out, without exposure to the financial risks of divorce. Cohabitation gives men regular access to the domestic and sexual ministrations of a girlfriend while allowing them greater legal, social and psychological freedom." But, the authors add, the vast majority of men share the same aspirations women do, to someday marry and have a family.